In ancient Greek, «Krisis» meant «decision, passage». And in Latin, «crisis» was the «the turning point in a disease». In other words, these definitions convey a phenomenon that is natural, useful and more than that, something positive. Indeed, I think we tend to overlook that this financial meltdown is going to be the best thing to happen to us. And I am going to prove it to you. And yes, that takes balls. 

For years we have been enduring complaints about mass consumption, careless societies, people interested in purely selfish pleasures who buy, spend, shop, get things and things and more things. Carrie Bradshaw, the icon of a whole generation, seems to be the emblem of a shopping addict, wasting huge amounts of money on clothes and shoes (even though there is nothing wasteful when it comes to Manolo Blahnik shoes). Anyway, ô joy, ô joy my friends, that time is over. 

Today, that kind of society is behind us, not because we don’t want to go on shopping (we do!) but because we no longer can. So we suddenly appear as free-minded, deep people, who don’t care about superficiality. Awesome. 

These times of passage are also going to be great for developing our humanity. I mean real humanity. Listening, thinking, laughing, breathing, creating bonds with others, and keeping them. As Blue Cantrell would put it « You have to let it breathe » my friends. And even though there might be no such thing as a free lunch (come to think of it, when is the last time you got anything for free?), there are still gifts we can give one another; time, thoughts, laughter, an ear, a smile, an inspiration. Open up and watch as people talk to each other again, share fears and hopes, get back their creativity, and join in a universal need for feeling alive. 

Last but certainly not least: the planet is going be saved thanks to the crisis, this turning point in our disease. And the best part about it, we don’t even have to try. Let’s face it, before the crisis, how many of us made conscious sacrifices for our planet? Of course we did it from time to time when we wanted to feel good about ourselves but I mean EVERYTIME ? Now we do it, right? Not because we think of the planet every single minute but because we think of our bills… nothing glorious here but the results are still there.  And in French we say « necessité fait loi », meaning that when we come back to the lowest levels of Maslow’s pyramid, we see what really matters and that necessity of survival dictates our behaviour and what comes next.

So ö joy, ö joy my friends, the passage to the stars and to a new dimension full of humanity and nature and simplicity and serenity is ahead of us. All we need is patience and faith because it is a fact it is all gonna be better thanks to this KRISIS.

 Here's a recipe for a healthy, delicious and moist (3 of our favorite adjectives) cake:

Ingredients:

1 cup yogurt

2 cups fine sugar

3 cups flour

pinch of salt

1/2c of cooking oil

2 teaspoon of baking powder

1 tablespoon of vanilla extract

3 eggs

1. Combine flour, sugar, baking powder and salt in mixing bowl.
2. Add oil, vanilla, yogurt and eggs.
3. Mix well until batter is smooth.
4. Pour into a well-greased cake pan and bake at 300º for 40-60 minutes until cake pulls away from the sides of the pan. Ovens will vary.

Note: Depending on season, add chopped up fresh fruit such as apples, pears, rhubarb. And chocolate chips never go out of style. The above are the basic ingredients.

SPAGHETTI SQUASH LASAGNA

Serves eight.

This recipe is an excellent substitute for your pasta cravings.  It is carb-free, and tastes just as delicious cold the next day.  Serve with sausage or pork chops and red wine.

You’ll need:

1 spaghetti squash

1 large red onion, sliced

2 garlic cloves, chopped

2 cups sliced mushrooms

1 cup pitted black olives, sliced

5 cups marinara sauce

1 large ball of mozzarella, sliced thin

Olive oil

Preparation:

Preheat oven to 375.  Pour a thin layer of water onto the bottom of a baking sheet.  Slice the spaghetti squash in half lengthwise, and scoop out the seeds.  Place the halves, cut sides down, on the baking sheet and cook for 40 minutes.  Allow to cool for 15 minutes, then use a fork to scrape out the squash – it will come out in long spaghetti-like strands.  Place the strands in a colander to drain excess moisture.  Set aside in a large bowl and turn the oven down to 350.

Sautee the onion, garlic and mushrooms in olive oil.  Gently mix the cooked vegetables, olives and marinara sauce with the spaghetti squash.  Pour half of the mixture into an ungreased casserole dish, and cover with sliced mozzarella, as you would a lasagna.  Pour the remaining mixture on top evenly, and cover with the rest of the cheese.  Bake for 35 minutes.  Serve hot. 

One of the worst side effects of unemployment (besides, of course, lack of financial stability, insecurity, general depression, etc.) is the boredom that comes with it. The thrill is gone – you’ve now caught up on your sleep, getting up at noon on a weekday is no longer a novelty, and sending out your resume only takes up so many hours in a day. So here are a few ideas with how you can fill your day.

1. Work out! For one thing, you get to use the word work in a sentence! And while all your friends are miserable eating junk food at their desks, you come out of this looking better than all of them (because let’s be honest, fear of losing one’s job is not flattering).
    
2.  Clean your house! It’s productive, it’s free, and everyone benefits. Just think, when you take someone home their first thought will be “well, they may not be working but doggone it they’re clean.” (Note from the editor: try not to take home anyone who says “doggone it”).
    
3. Organize your itunes. Your music is all over the place! Get it together! Don’t you hate having over 100 genres? Doesn’t it annoy you just the teensiest bit that The Beatles also comes up as Beatles and Beatle? Remember what Steve (ahem) Jobs said, itunes organization is next to godliness.
    
4. Since you're fixing up your itunes, make your friends mixes. Make playlists that fit every occasion! Who doesn’t need a dance playlist, a dinner party playlist, a “cheer-up” playlist, a “fuck off maybe I want to be sad” playlist?!
    
5. And while you’re on your computer, organize it! Make folders for everything! Delete files you don’t need and free up some hard drive space.
    
6. Now that you’ve freed up hard drive space, download more music for your amazing mixes! Get that amazing live cover no one knows about! Get the albums before they come out so that you can be over them by the time your friends are discovering them. 
    
7. Surf the internet and superficially learn as much as you can for your next dinner party. This is the time to find out about the last Elvis sighting. Read tons of editorials – it’s a great way to get the news and have someone else tell you what to think about current events.
    
8. Create a profile for some internet dating. You don’t have to meet them, but having random strangers flirt with you will boost your ego and definitely provide hours of distraction. Who couldn’t use the extra time for some mojo increase? It will come in handy when you take Mr. Doggone It home.
    
9. You cleaned your house, you made your dinner party mix, so now cook! Make recipes that take 4-5 hours to prepare. You’ll save money on going out while perfecting a useful skill and your flatmates/friends/close ones will love you for it. Plus you get to eat whatever you want because you’re working out the next day!

After a discouraging phone conversation with my mom about being unemployed, I hung up in tears, feeling so low and worthless, I immediately called my sister to vent.  Hearing my frustration, she suggested maybe there was hope.  Her recently laid-off roommate had just found a way to make some extra cash…But, HOW? WHAT? WHEN? Her answer was unexpected:  By answering online surveys.  

Hmm.  Now this was something I hadn’t thought of before.  Was it possible? Could I really earn money, while answering a bunch of questions about myself?  After my sister confirmed that her roommate was getting legit checks in the mail, I decided to give it a shot.   

The first survey I tried was called $5 in 5 minutes.  Well seeing as I’m unemployed, as luck would have it, I just so happened to have five minutes- and, being completely broke, I could certainly use  an extra five dollars. 

At first it seemed like a really warped blind date- with a computer.  Mr. Mac was awkwardly asking me every (and any) thing about myself- and to be perfectly honest, in my opinion, some of those questions were a little intimate for a first date.  

For example, one of the first questions was:  How often do you  buy toilet paper and if, and when you do, do you prefer ultra-soft?  Well, first of all, who DOESN’T prefer ultra soft? Second of all, I was more disturbed, or maybe fascinated, by the fact that I could have also chosen the option:  I DO NOT EVER BUY OR USE THIS PRODUCT.

I’m sorry, but if you don’t ever buy, OR USE, toilet paper, AND you’re so broke you have to answer online surveys to make extra cash- your life must be a whole lot worse than mine.  And while I began to consider the idea that this ridiculous person might actually exist somewhere out there in this big, wide world, I have to admit, I kind of started to feel a little bit better about myself.  Maybe this wasn’t such a bad blind date after all.  

But like most blind dates, it quickly turned sour.  After asking me more questions about my heart burn remedies, how often I buy electronic tooth brushes, and if I plan on starting an insurance business any time soon, Mr. Mac crossed the line.   

Do you have a bladder leakage problem and if so, do you prefer thin or thick absorption protection?  

I ask you.  I.  ASK. YOU:  How do you bounce back from that one on a first date? He may as well have gotten wasted, thrown up in my purse, and then tried to give me a big, sloppy kiss afterwards.  

I finished the rest of the survey as quickly as possible (I wanted the 5 bucks after all that!), and then I clicked the “My Rewards” button to see how I could redeem the 5 dollars.  

But all it said was:  Thank you for taking the $5 in 5 minutes survey.  Your current balance is:  $0.00.

Just as most girls complain to their friends after a disappointing date, all I could think was:  I knew it was too good to be true.

We’re all frequent fliers.  Though most of us do not have the luxury of jetting off to exotic hotspots often, we’ve put in our miles over the years.  (Ok, admittedly, travel these days is no picnic, especially with the ongoing search for 3 oz facial moisturizers).  But I’m not speaking literally.  How many among us revisit the same grocery store weekly, out of habit, comfort, taste?  There, we’re frequent buyers.  The same goes for retail.  Most of us revisit stores we know suit our personalities and budgets.

It’s important to feel like we transform ourselves seasonally, daily (for some us multiple times a day) through how we look, and this can mean fattening our wallets. I’m not suggesting this be accomplished through ATM withdrawals, of course.  Coupons have always been a staple of saving, and will continue to get us that additional deal at Saks.  But even better are membership points.  Stores like DSW, Men's Warehouse, Loehmann’s and SYMS offer membership cards that, unlike a charge card, don’t bait one to charge now and pay later.  (In no way is adding another charge card to your plastics a good idea.)  But with a free membership, stores track what you spend over the course of time, and once you hit a magic, surprisingly low, number, they – shock, gasp! – mail you money to spend at their store with no strings attached.

(A perfect example: I buy a lot of my shoes at DSW, and received $140 worth of coupons over 2 weeks.  Their sales are currently so impressive that, between their discounted price and my mail vouchers, I walked out with a $550 pair of Marc Jacobs shoes I had coveted for less than $10.)

So for our basics, it’s great to rack up on these memberships and finally look forward to getting mail from shops we love.  

And for more special pieces that adhere to the paper rule – sample sales are a great option (especially if you know a designer fits you well). Many of these sales are cash only, an unintentional means for self-control.  Set your spending limit in advance -- that’s the amount you should bring in, and not a dollar more.  Also, sample sales are final sale, so you better be damn sure you’re spending that cash wisely.

Like any competitive sport, there are guidelines to live by when you brave the sample sale, and inhibitions to leave behind.  A few to get you started:

1. Arrive early.  The best is the first to go.

2. There will be nude women, and more than likely you will be one of them (unless we’re shopping accessories, but even then you never know).  Wear a bra and underwear you’ll be comfortable getting knocked around in.

3. Try not to wear too many layers into the sale, or worse – shoes that are difficult to get in and out of.  You want a quick strip.

4. Bring a camera or camera phone (I’ve been to sales without mirrors).

5. Do not be afraid to linger near the girl trying on the last of the dress you love – and feel free to snicker at her in it if it will stop her from buying it.

6. Bring a friend.

7. Take as much time as you need in there – you waited outside for 40 minutes damnit!

Check out DailyCandy.com for updated sale dates/locations.  And your mailbox for membership cash rewards.  Happy shopping!

Serves four.

This dish can be served with an optional Harissa sauce, a North-African spicy sauce that gives a nice extra kick to the dish.

List of ingredients:  

- 2 packets of lamb shoulder (about 4 pieces altogether) 

- 4 cups of chicken stock (or good-quality broth)

- 1/2 cup of chopped cilantro

- 2 medium onions, peeled and diced

- 3 medium carrots, peeled and diced

- 1 medium turnip, peeled and diced

- 1 red pepper, diced

- 2 cloves of garlic, peeled and minced 

- 2 medium potatoes, peeled and diced

- seasoning: salt, pepper, turmeric and red pepper to taste. 

- plain couscous (Near East is a popular brand) 

- 2 tbsp oil (extra-virgin olive oil is overkill, plain olive/vegetable oil is fine)

Start by cutting all your vegetables.  The dice should be fairly coarse.  Season the lamb shoulder pieces with salt and pepper on both sides.  Heat over a medium-high flame 1 tbsp of the oil in an enamel dish or a large skillet.  Add the lamb pieces.  Sear on both sides until brown (about 5 min).  Remove the meat and keep it warm under another plate.  Remove excess fat from your dish and add the remaining tbsp of oil.  Add onions and cook until translucent (about 5 min).  Add the garlic and cook for another minute.  Now add the carrots, the turnip, the pepper and the potatoes.  Let all vegetables sweat for another few minutes, stirring often.  Add the chicken stock and the seasoning.  You should be able to cover your vegetables with the stock liquid.  if not, add more stock.  This dish MUST be kept moist..  When you add the seasoning, keep in mind that the red pepper is very hot.  Bring the vegetable mixture to a simmer.  Incorporate your meat pieces with their plate juices and let everything slowly simmer for another 45 minutes or so, preferably under a lid.  

About 10 minutes before the meat is ready, put a good laddle of the meat/vegetable juices in a sauce pan.  Add a spoon of butter or a dash of oil and bring to a boil.  Put in contents of couscous packet.  Cover and immediately remove from heat.  5 minutes later, pluff your couscous.  It should be moist but not overly wet.

To assemble: serve couscous in the bottom of a large shallow dish.  Add the pieces of lamb and then all the vegetables with their liquid.  Finally sprinkle dish with the chopped cilantro.  Present the dish on the dining table along with some Harissa sauce.  Voila!

I’ve started to notice that the more I ask certain people to read my screenplays, the less these certain people are in touch with me.  And frankly it’s starting to get to me, because I miss these people. 

Not to sound obnoxious, but I know it’s not because they don’t like me:  I’ve been told I’m a pretty easy person to get along with, I know I don’t smell bad (besides the one time I tried organic deodorant, but I swear I never made that mistake again), and I throw pretty darn good parties.  And I don’t think it’s because my screenplays are terrible because -again not to sound obnoxious- but I’ve been told I’m a pretty decent writer too.  So I’ve tossed out the idea that they don’t call or email me back because my screenplays are just that appalling.  

Sadly, I know the reason why they disappear:  it’s because they simply haven’t read my work, so they avoid me.  Which is really too bad because hey, I get it.  I’m a busy person too.  People ask me to read their stuff all the time- and I truly feel like an terrible person when I’ve chosen to go out to a recession-friendly happy hour, instead of staying in to read my friend’s script. 

Believe me, I understand life gets in the way.  And now more than ever, most people are focusing on themselves.  We’re all figuring out how to survive our own lives:  how to find a job, pay rent, or make that gross, mildewed pair of boots last just one more season…

But I miss a lot of these friends.  A lot of them.  Not all of them.  Come to think of it, asking some people to read my scripts could be a really clever way to alienate those particular individuals I don’t, deep down, actually like.  

Maybe I’d stop getting all these Facebook-Event-Invitations to hotel-bar birthday parties, which would be just fine with my wallet, because I really don’t need to be spending my George Washingtons on over-priced drinks for someone who isn’t that great of a friend anyways.  And maybe I could stop being worried about running into some of my lamer neighbors on the L train, because now, in a surprisingly fun twist of fate, they’d be worried about running into me- and now, they could be the ones who pretend not to see me, instead of the other way around.  Maybe I could even save the battery on my cell phone while I run errands in Brooklyn, because those not-so-awesome folks wouldn’t be calling me anymore, which would inevitably make- oh my goodness-  my cell phone bill go down! 

That’s it! I’ve got it! This is one answer to the recession! 

Send people your scripts, save face-time, save money.   

You’re welcome to try out this idea.  It was my pleasure to share.  But, if you’d like to return the favor, I’d be more than happy to send you one of my scripts. 

With all the fancy restaurants, shopping, and glitzy bars New York has to offer, I have sometimes wondered what would happen to this town if everyone just stopped trying to impress each other.  Unfortunately, with this economy, we may have to stop trying- whether we like it or not.  And it may sound crazy, but I think this could be a good thing.   

It dawned on me when I recently walked into a waxing/manicure boutique, and it was completely empty.  No one was getting their nails done, and I’m sure you’ll all appreciate my eloquence when I say no one was getting their hoo-hah “done” either.  As I looked at the waxing price list, my eyes widened: “Has waxing always been this expensive, or am I just looking at this with new (a.k.a. broke) eyes? 

I asked the boutique owner if it was usually this empty, and she said it had been like this for a while.  And I realized:  if New York women are re-thinking their waxing habits to save money, New York men are probably about to see way more body hair than they ever have.  Can they handle it?

Well, they may have to, and maybe this is okay.  I mean, if women are giving up their waxing appointments, men must be giving up something too.  Like the other day I saw an old friend, and I swear he was wearing a faded T-shirt he wore during our sophomore year at NYU (7 years ago)- but it still looked alright.  

Maybe the charade is over.  Maybe this means everyone is going to be forced to find someone who actually likes them for their real selves, instead of the perfectly waxed, perfectly dressed version of themselves.  No, no, don’t cry people.  This might not be as bad as it sounds.  For example,

Gentlemen, if you’re broke, and you can’t afford to take your new girl to that over-priced Lower East Side lounge, just grab a couple of cheap bottles from Trader Joes and invite her to your place.  Since you won’t be distracted by the loud bar music, maybe you’ll actually get to know each other because you’ll hear more than just, “And… tudied… antic … oetry.”  For those of you reading this who aren’t comfortable with the whole “getting to know someone thing” (a.k.a. INTIMACY) here’s a bone:  You may also have a way better chance of seeing her naked, since your bed will be much more appealing to her than that subway ride home- I don’t know anyone who can afford those drunken late night  cabs any more.

And Ladies, if you can’t afford that Gossip-Girl-inspired outfit you’ve been eyeing, RELAX. First of all, it's winter.  And when it’s freezing, no one pays that much attention to what you’re wearing- besides your coat, EVERYONE notices your coat. So rewind to your Dawson’s Creek days and pull out a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. The girl-next-door-look always works, and let’s face it, it’s much more comfortable to wear. Plus, he’ll think you’re so down to earth since you’re wearing the newly fashionable I-have-no-one-to-impress-look. BONUS: I’m pretty sure since everyone’s totally broke that no one’s going out to dinner anymore. I’ll bet you 2 tickets to “Bride Wars” if you wear an outfit that channels Joey Potter, while you’re cooking him some pasta, he won’t give a damn what label you’re wearing.  Seriously, he’s probably just as broke as you are, and a warm, home-cooked meal just may be sexier to him now than any Marc Jacobs dress.

So maybe this isn’t going to be so bad. What’s the worst that could happen? Someone begins to love you for your broke-ass self.  That wouldn’t be so bad, would it?

Possibly the worst thing that comes with unemployment is having to answer the question, how was your day? There’s no great way to answer that. “Uh, sent out my resume to 5 companies and then looked at all of my ex-girlfriend’s pictures on facebook…” No no no, it just won’t do. The truth is, people at an office probably spend just as much time (okay, maybe not quite as much time) fooling around. They IM, they read perezhilton, op-ed pieces in the LA Times – they’re just like us, only they get paid for it. So here are a few possible answers the dreaded “What did you do today” question.

1. You know, it’s been so great having all this time. I feel like I’m finally catching up on all these projects I never got around to tackling when I was at my job (the key to answering this question is to always try and make your friend envious of your free time)

2. Oh wow, difficult to answer because I feel like I’m really using this time to reevaluate things in my life. I was so caught up with the nitty gritty and grind of it all that I’m now just trying to make every moment meaningful (zing!) 

3. Well I worked out – as you can probably tell I’ve been working out a lot (you slob) and made this amazing gourmet meal (you unhealthy asshole) 

4. I’m actually spending a lot of time educating myself and reading up a storm (so what if it’s all celebrity gossip? No one needs to know the details)

5. I volunteered at a soup kitchen in my neighborhood. I feel it’s time to give back (THAT will shut ‘em up) .

6. I’ve actually been reconnecting with a lot of friends who I feel I’ve neglected over time (this can mean ANYTHING… God bless instant messaging). 

7. I had a few meetings, nothing I can talk about yet.  (anything can be called a meeting – technically, you “met” with the deli guy when you bought your coffee from him this morning).

8. I’m looking into a few job possibilities, but it’s too early to discuss and I don’t want to jinx myself (because, what isn’t a job possibility? A chance encounter with an old friend could turn into a job, which means that any drink or meal or social outing is a job possibility). 

Much like hotel room bibles and fire extinguishers, coupons are the type of thing I’ve always been aware of, but never really needed or used.  As long as I can recall getting a newspaper, either Long Island ’s Newsday that my parents got when I was a kid or the Los Angeles Times I get now, coupons have always been part of it.  

And lately it seems like every other day, as part of some subscription that I never signed up for, I get mailed a stack of offers from every supermarket and generic restaurant in a 5 mile radius.  And without fail, the coupons go straight into the trash.  It’s kind of depressing, actually. 

I figure that in my life thus far, 3 trees have had to die so I can get “2 for $1.99!” offers from my local grocery store. When you consider the collective effort that’s gone into printing and delivering coupons just so they can be thrown out, it’s enough wasted energy to make even the most hardened Exxon executive wince.

Efficiency aside, coupons have always been a mystery to me.  As a concept, I admit it makes total sense, but I’ve just never assumed that I was the type of person to use them.   They must be there for someone else, right? I mean, none of my friends do it, and the only times I’ve seen them in use - it’s typically a very older woman in front of me on line at the supermarket.  And then, the only thing I take away from it is a sense of annoyance that it slowed me down.

Last week, however, during my ritual walk from the mailbox to the garbage, all this suddenly changed.  With the sense of clarity that must have struck Newton the moment he discovered gravity, it occurred to me that I may be missing the point.

In other areas of shopping I go out of my way to save a buck.  I’ll drive across town to save $.08 on a gallon of gas. Shopping online, you’d think I was a depression era mother of 5 the way I price compare and make sure I was getting the best possible deal.  It seems I’d even fly out of the airport 2 cities away to save $20 bucks on a flight.  As aggressive as I am when there’s a sense of anonymity, I cast all that aside when I shop locally. 

Every week, and often every day, stores go out of their way to make it cheaper for me to get the same products.  Not taking them up on their offers runs completely counter to my instinct to save money in every other aspect of my life.  A confused sense of pride has kept me from saving even more money… so I can buy more stuff.  How very un-American of me.  I was suddenly armed with the firm belief that I had to cross over into the world of coupons.

Deciding I should test the waters by starting small - as opposed to couponing a Thanksgiving dinner meal - I decided to start with a coupon for a fast food/take-out kind place in my area.

The object of my affection was Big Mamma and Pappa’s Pizza (36pizza.com), a local franchise whose claim to fame, if you could call it that, is their 36” pie.  The offer: $7.99 for a 13” pizza with 2 toppings.  Located in the East Hollywood section of Los Angeles , it’s the sort of place that I would ordinarily keep driving past when in the mood for pizza.

“Coupons are about saving, not enjoyment,” I told myself as I cut it out of the mailed circular.  To my surprise, however, a quick search on Yelp produced a bunch of very positive reviews.  With a sense of relief that I wouldn’t be having the worst pizza in my life for the sake of saving 4 bucks, I placed my order and headed over.

Stepping up to the counter, I felt nervous about handing in the coupon.  I thought all my fears would be validated and the whole staff would come out to get a look at the guy under 60 who’s using the coupon.  Very quietly, I explained that I had the coupon and handed it over.

To my surprise, however, it wasn’t a big deal.  No scarlet “C’, no second glances. It was completely… normal.   I handed over the coupon, the cashier handed me my pizza and we both said thanks and went our separate ways.

And the pizza was really good! Sauce, cheese, toppings… everything added up and it was quite tasty.  Bottom line was that I got a pizza I would have paid full price for, but saved $4.  Enough savings to get me a free PBR at any respectable dive bar.  I call that a win.

I hope to go back again… never paying full price, of course.  I’m feeling inspired about this. Like when you go to the gym for a few weeks and start to feel like its working, I’ve been thinking about all the meals I have and how much I can save.  

$3-$5 bucks, here and there, actually starts to add up.  If the economic crisis is the result of living beyond our collective means, then I’m going to do my part and be a little smarter about how I spend.  If only to buy me more free drinks. Stay tuned!

I’m not asking you. I’m begging you. Please, oh great government of the USA. Please. Tell me lies. Tell me sweet little lies. Even though we’re better apart, let’s give it a try – tell me lies (tell me, tell me lies…)

The basis for any relationship is trust, and while I’m not going to pretend that I had any kind of faith in the American government, I thought we had some kind of understanding. Much like a philandering husband, we had an agreement. I looked the other way while you had your affairs, and in return you offered a version of stability. But now, I’ve discovered you weren’t just a cheat, you were involved in some crazy sex scandal that involved everyone from the neighbor’s dog to the next-door dwarf. And the worst part is that you destroyed MY expensive lingerie in the process, and now you want ME to foot the bill and replace it. 

The sex dungeon imagery may be a little bit farfetched, but there is no denying that we need trust and a feeling of security for a healthy relationship with our respective government. I know many people who have stable jobs that pay well, but who aren’t spending money right now. Why? Because the way things are going, they’re not convinced the government will be there for them in 6 months. We need to regain our trust and fast, and I propose to do this in the quickest, swiftest way possible. Lie. Not a blatant Madoffian lie, a simple little white lie will do just fine. Pretend I asked if my jeans make my butt look big. Make believe you love that fruitcake I gave you. Do that face you do when you say “Nooooo officer, was I really going that fast???” Tell me it’s going to be okay. That’s all I want to hear. Just say that in a few months it will all be back to normal. Look me in the eyes and tell me that was turbulence, not a wing that fell off the plane. I need to know that we’re all going to make it safe and sound. The Dow plummets when Bernanke or Paulson speak? Then shut ‘em up. We don’t need to hear that. No one likes the bearer of bad news. You’re unpopular enough as it is, can’t you just pretend we’re internet dating? How will I ever find out you’re 5’8 instead of 5’11? And by the time we meet I’ll be so smitten with your sense of humour I guarantee I won’t even notice those few inches. 

It’s not that I’m an advocate for dishonesty – not in the least buuuuuuut… If some exaggeration will make me feel better, I’ll take it. I need a hug and if it comes under the form of a white lie, well then, yes, that dress is flattering on you and you don’t look a day over 20. 

Dov Charney is in trouble.  It’s not the multiple counts of sexual harassment against him.  Nor that his pornographic ads have upset another member of the Christian Right.   It’s the pricetag dangling from teeshirts sold as his American Apparel stores.  Paying $40 for a tank top doesn’t seem like such a bargain these days. 

With thinning wallets, what new trends and fashions will be embraced?  Will “fabulousness” give way to understatement?  Will Zoolander’s “Derelict” collection be realized?  (Hopefully not.)  From Balenciaga to Banana Republic, prices have been slashed and thrashed, yet even the super sale price may be too high for many of us to consider.  This begs the question… how to get dressed when you’re recessed?

1. The Dreaded B Word

You’ve been let go from your job, or maybe you’re just generally looking to cut back on big spending.  This doesn’t mean you have to stop looking great, it just means you have to be craftier about how you do it.  Sit down and – gulp – make a budget for your monthly spending.  What can you really afford to be spending on your wardrobe, without giving up meals?

2.  Editing

Comb through your closets and drawers.  Not only will you discover pieces you forgot you had, but you will get a fuller picture for what you’re really in need.  Pull out anything you never wear and never will (remember that goucho craze you went through!? Ouch).  If things are in bad condition, toss them, but if they’re wearable, try selling them to a local second hand shop, or online (ebay, craigslist).  If that fails, at the very least donate them to a Goodwill for the tax break.

3.  You have friends, doncha?

Swap and share your wardrobe.   A circle of friends can throw a clothes-swap party where everyone walks away with new goodies.  And remember: dry cleaning your girlfriend’s borrowed cocktail dress is loads cheaper than buying yourself a new one.  Also, if you’re a fashion magazine junkie, note which of your friends subscribes to Vogue.  Swap her your W when you’ve done with it, and double your eye candy.

4.  Accessorize

Throw a belt around a cardigan and transform it.  Add a lariat to your favorite dress, and you can sell it as new.  Stocking up on hats, gloves, tights, belts and jewelry can freshen an ensemble so that you can wear it a dozen different ways, and will expand your closet remarkably.

5.  Treat yourself

Everyone experiences that “I’ve got to have that” moment, regardless of their financials.  Don’t let Fannie and Freddie stop you from splurging occasionally.  But if these moments seize you too often, refer back to #1.

Here is an article featuring 20 wines for under $10 to accompany your recipes for under $10!

http://www.bonappetit.com/magazine/2009/01/twenty_wines_for_ten_dollars_or_less

And remember, drinking responsibly is for people with jobs!

One of my all-time favorite soups consisting of the "holy trinity" of garden vegetables: carrots, leeks and celery

The key here is to have equal parts of each vegetable.  I usually double the proportions (2 cups of each) since I usually make my own chicken stock in larger quantities.  These vegetables are cheap but good butter and good stock can be more pricy.  I buy kitchen basics stock for $3.99/qt.  That's a good brand.  Substitute with broth for less money.  I never use broth, though, given the high levels of sodium.

About the herbs: these are also pricy if bough fresh.  Ideally that's the way to go.  Otherwise, substitute with dry herbs (but NEVER use dry parsley.. under no circumstances is this cool).  

Here goes:

1 stick unsalted butter  

1 cup celery, cleaned and diced

1 cup carrots, peeled and diced

1 cup leeks, cleaned and diced

1 cup onion, peeled and diced

1 qt (4 cups) of chicken stock

1 bouquet garni consisting of a few sprigs of thyme, parsley and 1 bay leaf  

salt, pepper

In a soup pot, melt the butter at medium-high heat.  Add half the butter and stir with onions for 2-3 minutes.  Add all other vegetables and the rest of the butter.  Stir for a few more minutes until all the butter is absorbed by the vegetables (here using 2 sticks instead of 1 would not hurt one bit!)  Add the stock.  Add dry herbs or bouquet garni. 

Once the liquid starts boiling, reduce temperature to a simmer and let cook for about 30 minutes.  

Remove bouquet garni, if using, and puree the vegetables in the pot with a rotor blade, or in a blender (note: prefer the rotor blade as putting hot liquids in blenders can be pretty disastrous!)     

Strain the soup.  Discard all solids (or keep it for high-quality baby food!).  Season with salt, fresh black pepper and a hint of cayenne pepper (latter is optional).   

Return the soup to a boil, then cut heat.  Correct seasoning.  Serve immediately on soup plates, add a dollop of cream (or, even better, creme fraiche) and garnish with parsley.